Baby Care

Posts Tagged ‘First Born’

What to do when the first-born is showing extreme jealousy towards the new baby? This question often bothers all the parents. We are here to help you solve this problem.

You have to teach your older child how to interact with his new sibling in proper ways. You can teach your toddler how to play with the baby in the same way you teach him anything else. Increase your little demonstrations of love for your child. Say extra I love you, increase your daily dose of hugs, and find time to read a book or play a game. Temporary regressions or behavior problems are normal, and can be eased with an extra dose of time and attention. Whenever the children are together, “hover” close by. If you see your child about to get rough, pick up the baby and distract the older sibling with a song, a toy, an activity or a snack.

Avoid comparing siblings, even about seemingly innocent topics such as birth weight, when each first crawled or walked, or who had more hair! Children can interpret these comments as criticisms. Whenever you see the older child touching the baby gently, make a positive comment. Make a big fuss about the important “older brother.” Hug and kiss your older child and tell him how proud you are.

Here are tips on how to cope with a jealous older sibling:

• Teach your older child to interact with the baby in the proper way. You can do this by explaining to your child that the baby is delicate at this age and requires careful handling.
• Involve your older child in caring for the new baby. For instance, you can ask your child to rock the baby’s cradle gently or help to dress the baby.
• Be lavish with your praise every time you observe the older child behaving gently with the baby.
• Avoid neglecting the older child. Try to continue to do the things you did with your older child before the baby was born.
• Avoid drawing comparisons between your child and the baby. Your older child could interpret this as criticism.
• If your child verbally expresses resentment towards the baby, do not be defensive about the baby. Respond gently and reassuringly.
• Unless you are confident that the older sibling will not harm the baby, never leave your children alone together.

Take a deep breath and be calm. This is a time of adjustment for everyone in the family. Reduce outside activities, relax your housekeeping standards, and focus on your current priority, adjusting to your new family size.